If there's one thing Australians know how to do well, it's Morning Tea.
Ask any typical Australia how many meals they eat in a day and they are extremely likely to tell you three normal meals plus Morning and Afternoon Tea. I've a sneaking suspicion this is why we have now apparently over-taken the US with regards to obesity but I also want to add I wouldn't be surprised if it's what people are now days eating for Morning Tea not the fact that we eat it.
Anyway, I will admit it: I have missed Morning Tea. I love that everyone stops for 20 minutes in the morning to have a cuppa (again with the Google Translator: "Cuppa" is the abbreviation for "Cup of Tea" but can also mean coffee), a small something to eat and a chat. Now I know what you're thinking: we do that too -- we just call it 'snack'. Well I'm here to refute that -- snack and Morning Tea are simply NOT the same. You can't have a proper Morning Tea in 10 minutes. You can't grab Morning Tea on the run. Oh, you mean 'brunch' then. No! I most emphatically DO NOT mean 'brunch' either! Brunch is late breakfast/early lunch. Morning Tea is less than brunch and more than a snack, always includes a drink and you simply must sit down to enjoy it. It's Morning Tea. While you could eat mostly anything for Morning (or Afternoon) tea, there do exist special foods that really only fall into the 'consumed with tea' category as well but we'll touch on that after the etiquette lesson shall we?
So here is a little culture lesson -- get your pinkies out!
Step 1. Company
Morning Tea is really intended to be a social event so it's really important to take your morning tea with the right company. It's cheaper than a lunch date, far less formal than dinner, and a lot more fun than on your own (although it can be done).
Step 2. Location
Will you be at home? A coffee shop? Extra points to you if you find a lake-side location!
Step 3. Tea and Cake
Like I said previously, many foods can be consumed for Morning Tea but kudos to you if you serve or go out for special Morning Tea foods. Take Devonshire Tea for example (please note: I'm talking about the authentic Devonshire Tea -- if you've heard this concept used to denote other types of tea parties then you've been majorly mis-informed). There is nothing more pleasant than tea with scones, jam and cream.
But those are biscuits, I hear you say. Nope -- they are scones. Somewhere along the lines, the Americans got their pastries mixed up.
Step 4. Socialize
Morning Tea is a perfect opportunity to organise your next road trip, discuss dismal political candidate options (seriously people, this is when we check the box that says 'none of the above -- lets go back to beginning and try again'), and talk about all manner of child-rearing issues. It's also a good time to catch up with old friends that you're not sure you want to spend that much time on (lunch would be too long but you do want to see them).
* Don't say "These pumpkin biscuits will go well with the soup tonight." If an Australian mentions that she made Pumpkin Scones, they are meant to be consumed for Morning Tea because they are sweet.
* Don't say "These are really tiny pancakes." They are pikelets which are entirely different to pancakes. Eat them like a scone.
* Don't consider eating and running a full-scale morning tea. Don't be surprised either if you ask and Australian "Did you have Morning Tea today?" and they say no but they did manage to grab an apple or a few crackers on their way to the shop this morning. The apple or crackers don't count because there was no tea or sitting involved.
* When an Australian suggests we do Morning Tea don't say yes and start organising Brunch. As we previously discussed, these are not one and the same. Most emphatically. Generally speaking, you can't eat waffles and bacon for Morning Tea.
And lastly,
* Don't eat Devonshire Tea for Morning Tea everyday. We don't want to be the fattest country on earth people!
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